42. Memorial.

today, i felt a very different kind of pain.
the kind of pain that i will never wish upon anyone.
i didn’t lose a mother, but it certainly felt like it.

today, i’ve also seen how painful it is to lose someone dearest to you when you’re ten thousand miles away and not be able to do anything about it at all.
the kind of pain where you cry for hours on but it still hurts after, where every little thing around you reminds you of that person.
it hurts. a lot.

you were like a mother to us. you were the epitome of a strong and successful woman that we’d want to be when we grew up.
i will never forget the packets of nasi kandar you bought us when us four girls were in boarding school together. and the advice you’d always given us.

i only wish we had more time with you.
rest in peace aunty jun. we miss you.